Actually, I am going to start with Sunday. Yesterday was just an absolutely amazing day. I spent the whole day with family which is one of the greatest things ever. Ok, so it was my church family but they're my family nonetheless. Apart from that, Church was just...what can i say? AMAZING! God came through in worship in the same awesome way that He has been for the last couple of months. God is working in such an amazing way at BCI at the moment. He comes through and fills the hall with His glorious presence and touches the very depths of every member of the congregation's soul. These times bring such a great revelation of Psalm 42:7 -
"[Roaring] deep calls to [roaring] deep at the thunder of Your waterspouts; all Your breakers and Your rolling waves have gone over me."
I walk away from every Sunday service feeling like I have met face to face with my King, my Dad, my All Consuming One. It's the most amazing feeling ever!!! The Lord is truly good...
So apart from getting home with a pounding tension headache and having been in the freezing cold called the British Outdoors for an hour waiting for buses, etc. I had a great day. In fact, the weekend was over all just great. Especially with a 42-6 Springbok win over England at Twickenham.
So, Monday arrives...GULP!!
It started really well actually. Everything was going pretty well until around 10:30am. I got an e-mail from our HR department with a resolution to the case I had opened to find out what help the company could offer me for my work permit application. Well, you can probably guess what it said. I'll tell you anyways. It said something along the lines of "we are unable to sponsor a work permit unless the position in question can not be filled by another citizen in the UK." Well, in a matter of 5 mins my whole day was dashed, broken, smashed and swept into the closest rubbish bin. In fact, not just the whole day but the next 3-4 months coz now I will have this thing looming over my head that I'll have to pack up my tent and move back to my origin.
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Everything that I thought my life would be is no longer. I almost feel like I was a part of the group of Hebrews that was left after Korah and his followers were burned to a crisp and swallowed by the Earth: moving from where they were back to the Red Sea. "Why go back when I am so close to the promised land?" All of a sudden I start seeing this as the story of my life. When things are going well, I don't put so much into my relationship with God but when things get bad, the why's and where's and what's fly. God forgive me!!
"'For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways', says the Lord" (Is 55:8)
I won't lie to you, the thought of having to leave my life, my family and my friends here scares me in a way that I can not even describe. But I have to keep focussed on the fact that my God is the God over the universe. He holds ALL things in the palm of His hand. And to be honest, I should have known that God would move me. It is probably the most difficult part of moving alongside the Apostolic nature of God. He is a sending and moving God. He is not a staying God. Our God is a pilgrim, a pioneer and so He yearns to raise His people up to be the same. What a privilege to be a part of all of that! What a privilege to be CHOSEN to move with God in the flows of the Apostolic, to take His Good News to a people, a city, a nation so in need of His love. The Apostolic is an adventure and in almost every adventure there are casualties and disappointments but those tend to make one stronger and more aware.
I am on this adventure now and there is no turning back. No matter where this adventure takes me, I will seek to see His Kingdom established in my own life and in the lives of those around me. I will not be anchored at this shore, nor do I think that I will be anchored at any shore. God's call is MUCH bigger than one nation. It is a GREAT ADVENTURE!
"I live each day for You
I breathe each breath for You
I give my life to You
King of the Heavens
Exalted forever!"
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